No matter who you vote for the government always wins

Well, it’s very off-topic but I’ve been itching to ask my American readers: who will you be voting for?
I know that it’s a puppet show, but whoever wins sends a message to the world.
Do please elaborate in the comments, thankyouverymuch.
Edit: interesting video mash ups.
Racism: on how McCain’s campaign is benefiting from racism
[...]

Untreatable Depression

I love Thursdays.

It’s misery pornography.  People sell their stories to these magazines, and then people, like me, read them to feel better about their own pitiful, minute existence.  Suffice to say that I love them and they are my not so guilty weekly pleasure.  And doesn’t, “Quantum of Colin” sound like the dullest science fiction [...]

The last October snowfall in London was in 1934 so I celebrated with my camera, a cigarette, a can and a complete stranger

Which probably indicates something apocalyptic about climate change but I don’t care.
I’ve just had one of those lovely experiences that makes me grateful for both life and London.  I have a big smile on my face.  
Firstly, I should say that thanks to your incredible generosity (see a previous post for what was going on), [...]

Dead Set / Pitchforks out for Kerry Katona

As I write, I’m listening to Gnossienne No. 1 by Erik Satie. I’m very fond of Satie, who is an incredibly imaginative writer, as well as a wonderful composer. However, the room appears to have shrank and, try as I might, I can’t seem to squeak out a crumb of humour as it’s playing, which [...]

All my life all I have wanted is a middle initial

Today’s my one week failure to die anniversary!  I feel warm inside.  Hmm.
Thank you very much for the responses to my previous post, in which the whole “Introvert” theory seems to be proving itself once more.  A startling 77% of us so far are Introverted types.  I’m glad we talk on the internet or else [...]

Personality Types of People with Manic Depression

I had a lot of sleep.  I feel much better today and am now approaching “human”.  I told the CPN what was going on and she attributes it to Lamictal withdrawal, shock and my body shouting, “For god’s sake just take a bath and go to bed!  I’m going to spontaenously combust!”
Over at Psych Central, [...]

Night under water

This post feels fairly pointless and aimless but light and sound is rushing in and out of my head.  It has taken me over two hours to write this because I feel so bloody weird.  
I still have the epic shakes; that’s two tops ruined from tea spills. I’m glad I don’t take sugar.  There [...]

Psych Central’s Top 10 Bipolar Blogs 2008

I am absolutely thrilled to have received second place in PsychCentral’s illustrious list of the Top 10 Bipolar Blogs 2008.  The list was, as far as I’m aware, compiled with input from their readers, John M. Grohol, Psy.D. and Sandra Kiume.
Here’s what they have to say.
2. MentallyInteresting.org – Pole to Polar: The Secret Life of a Manic-Depressive
Seaneen, [...]

Empty boxes everywhere

Gosh, it’s very heavy around here at the moment, isn’t it?  I’ll try to make this one of the last posts on the topic before I incite my readers to hari-kari. 
I’m writing this down for my own benefit; we’ve found and counted up the empty pill packets from the shoebox (the medication I habitually took [...]

When the sun it deigns to shine, I feel no better

I absolutely hate writing these kinds of despairing posts.  Even if it’s true, it feels melodramatic and adolescent.  Don’t be surprised if I delete it, as I often do with these kinds of posts.  They are the written equivalent of banging ones head against a wall.
On a minute high note, thank you for donating.   [...]

One of those weeks

Right, I feel like a filthy scrounger for this, but if you’ve ever wanted to use the <—- “Donate” button over there, now is a very good time to do so. 
Basically, I need help this month.  I do manage pretty well for money due to scrupulous budgeting, but this month, on checking my balance, I [...]

I’m a bad ambassador

Well, how do I feel now that I’ve recovered my mental faculties?
Like a “piggin’ idiot”, as Nick Frost would say.  
Physically, I feel pretty bad.  The whole, “Did someone kick seven bells out of me?” sensation hasn’t subsided.   I had a fit, or seizure or something like it which meant that I liberally smashed [...]

Well, I feel a bit daft.

(this post has been edited a million times)
Hello chaps.  Feel I owe you all an explanation.  I am, as you can see, alive.  This account isn’t that reliable because I was totally out of it.  Rob has filled me in a lot of it.
Firstly, thanks for all your comments and concern.  Special thanks to Neil [...]

so

To get rid off my brain screaming about my Box of Tricks, which I thought had included lithium and depakote but apparently not, I took everything in the box.
Blah blah massive ovedose, you know the story, see next post.
Aside of loss of balance, I report NO SIDE EFFECTS WHATSOVER.  Not even feeling sick.
My box of [...]

Unintentionally hilarious “Well Being” videos

Here’s a series of advertisements from “Well Being East”. They are, unsurprisingly, designed to “promote well being” and seem to be sponsored by the Mental Health Foundation. Maybe some of you in the east of England have seen them?
Watch the “positive thinking” one, and notice the difference between the “negative” man and the [...]

Goodbye, Jay

I am completely shocked today to learn of the death of the most wonderful Jay Wilson, the remarkable writer of the blog Raw and Elemental.  We corresponded by e-mail and I’ve been following his blog and his battle with lung cancer for over a year.  He died on October 10th in the arms of his wife [...]

A Video

Goddamn it!  I am in a good mood today (and was yesterday for the most part too- two days in a row!  That’s like two years to me!) and I wanted to record the momentous occasion.  Also, I broke my spacebar (which is now working again) so I couldn’t type.
Anyway, look here, I made you [...]

Two years

Today is my two year not-being-in-hospital anniversary!  
Two years ago today, my tenth or eleventh nervous breakdown culiminated in slashing my throat and being frogmarched to the local mental hospital where I was a voluntary patient who became an involuntary one.  After almost ten years of rapid cycling mania, psychosis, paranoia, depression, suicide attempts, self [...]

The power of prayer

It seems to be summer again in London! 
I know how dull it is to mention the weather but I thought it vaguely interesting as it was arctic here but a few days ago.  There’s a sense of festival on the road as people throw off their jackets and sun their arms.
I must be sure I [...]

I Could Be Wrong, I Could Be Right

Hundreds of people read this post and seven people commented!  The internet, there!  Then again, I’m a notorious lurker.
I’m only joking!
My appointment with the new care coordinator began on a very bad note.  She handed me a printout from Alternative Depression Therapy.
It must be said that I wasn’t very graceful in my response, which was [...]