I didn’t get into King’s

Feel completely devastated. Probably because I sucked so much at interview. Red wine and crying for tonight. I wish I didn’t live here right now, that I hadn’t moved here in the hope I’d be going there; I have to pass King’s College Hospital and the Maudsley all the time. I also wish I had some friends (most people on my FB are people I have never met, and am not likely to, to give you a measure of such things) so I could ring someone up and ask them to sit with me and listen to me bawl my eyes out because I feel foolish and lonely doing it on my own. That said, people are being lovely and supportive and cheering. But I really want my sisters! Damn sea and Newcastle.

I don’t have anything more than a mobile internet connection and few DVDs so I can’t even watch shite on TV to distract myself and cheer myself up. I am embarrassed because I found out in the middle of my class and I had to leave before I burst into tears in front of our King’s lecturer! I just feel stupid, I feel thick and not good enough. I look at my lack of qualifications, not even a job in the past four years, and think, “Of course they didn’t offer me a place. Why would they?” I feel like a failure. I know it’s irrational but it’s how I feel. I have worked my arse off.

Tomorrow I will hopefully feel better. Tomorrow I’ll think of plan Bs. Tonight I am allowed to cry for something I had my heart set on.

PS: Goodbye third year elective in Zambia. Would have been fun.

30 Responses

  1. I’m so sorry. 😦

  2. I’m sorry too, I know how this feels 😦

  3. I’m so sorry, their loss hon.

  4. Words fail me. xx

  5. I am sorry to echo everyone else but i truly am sorry 😦 thinking of you and sending hugs

  6. Telephone 07527474790 24/7

  7. I’m sorry Seaneen 😦

  8. For whatever is worth, I really thought you would pass because I think you have what it takes. I may not know you much but I believe in you. Get some rest today and keep trying. *lots of hugs*

  9. I’m so sorry Seaneen 😦 I wish I could say or do more.

    Thinking of you x

  10. Aw, love, I’m sorry. I know that disappointment all too well. I do hope you try again in a year.

  11. I’m so sorry too, been following your story on fb & was hoping you’d get in. Your story echoes mine very closely, so fingers crossed something better will turn up, like it did for me.

  12. of course you’re fucking allowe to cry you don’t need to justify yourself. though as a blogger i know how you feel. scrutinized. and that people jump on what you say, pick it apart and react as if THEY had said it (with their own meanings, assocations etc) not that YOU said it with your life your experience etc etc.

    look you have so much to offer, so (obviously) did a lot of other candidates … i have no doubt in my mind that you will find yourelf Making a Bigger Difference very soon. maybe you haven’t even seen the possibilities yet. they do have a way of hiding until you nearly get there then … oh!

    try not to be too upset. as you say the time for picking yourself up and dusting down is tomorrow. but you don’t need to apologize or stray anywhere near that territory: you’re so upset because you ARE going to be good at what you do. you’ve done their interview once, so you’re better set for next year, IF that is what you choose to do

    good luck!

  13. Oh I am so sorry Seaneen. That is really bloody shitty. You are going to be such an incredible mental health nurse, and although it sounds like a cliche, they really don’t know what they are missing. Are you able to contact them for feedback? If you are intending to reapply next year rather than go to second choice then it might be helpful, but I know that right now all you want to do is cry. xxxx

    • Usually if they reject at interview you cant reapply. It sucks.

      It aint the end though. I know sooo many people who got rejected from all their favs or missed their firm or insurance and end up finding another course or another uni and love it.

      just rembeber that your sad bbecause you miss what SEEMS like the bbest choice for yiu, not bbecause you missed what IS the best choice.

  14. Hey hun sometimes these things happen simnply because of numbers. Last year i uni i had an interview with had 200 applicants to 15 places the good news is though that there is still a chance youll get in through clearing. also it maybe a good idea to call them they may be able to give you feedback about why you didnt get in, and it can help if and when you reapply

  15. If you didn’t have occasional setbacks like this you would wind up being a very complacent, unappreciative person. Just take it on the chin and get to work thinking about other options.

    And btw based on this comment thread it doesn’t look as though you have no friends 🙂

  16. A good cry is def. in order. I’m so sorry, I know you wanted it so bad. They are thick, daft and a lot of other more horrible adjectives for not snatching you up. You are so more than good enough.

  17. this kind of rejection is devastating. for what it’s worth you aren’t stupid or a failure – rejection just makes us feel that way. you will do Great Things, seaneen!

  18. Wish I could give you a hug.

  19. I have no friends either bar online ones! Im sorry you didnt get in to your choosen uni, look at it as an opputunity to do some more courses learn so more, get some more experiences under your belt, easier said than done though I know!

  20. So sorry. I know what you mean about having to pass there all the time. I was at Kings the other day and felt a twinge of something/regret about missed opportunities/not nice whatever it was.

    I hope something works out. You will be a great MH nurse. I would love a CPN that gets it & all of your future patients will be blessed.

  21. I guess that in the long-term it’s about doing the job you want to do, rather than where you obtain the qual. University only lasts for a few short years, and these are over in a flash. I know when you’re in this situation it feels all-consuming, but it all comes out in the wash. I am doing the job I studied for and wanted to do and University feels like a lifetime ago now…and I’m really not upset now at not getting into the Slade, in fact am glad I didn’t.

  22. Try not to take it too hard, it’s not personal. And I didn’t get into either of the medical schools I wanted to – and had to apply a second year and still didn’t – but I was totally happy with where I went. Trust the universe. And it’s their loss (what I can say in retrospect). It really is. They are missing out on a wonderful candidate with a ton to offer.

  23. Sorry to hear that. It’s crap. You have to set your heart on things in life, it’s what gives you drive and expectation but when they fall through it hurts. A lot. Damn it! I’d cry and cry and generally be a pathetic heap of snot and tissues, if that happened to me (and things similar have happened, many times). Pooey, pooey, crap.

    You will make a fabulous mental health nurse, Seaneen, what ever route you take to that goal.

  24. Please don’t take it personally. The lovely economic situation means that there are more people returning to education (hence more applicants) but fewer places. Having sat on admission committees (not in the UK), I know the situation of having 400 applicants for 15 places is not uncommon.

    Most places understand that, and re-applying is often looked upon favourably (you’re not just doing this on a lark)

    You’d make a fabulous mental health nurse. Please don’t let this discourage you.

    Of course, it still feels like absolute shite. I’ve been there, so please don’t think I’m being dismissive. I know that red wine and crying help a lot 😉



  25. Seenan if I don’t say this now I’ll forget: I applied and got into uni twice … very long story … point being I ONLY LISTED MY TOP CHOICE on the form. I applied nowhere else at all, either time. Maybe if you really do want Kings above all else you should just apply there next time. Do not apply anywhere just for the sake of it or to fill up that bit of form. Just advice from someone who’s done it twice and got in twice.

    Fair dos the economic climate was not what it is now. Far as I know in the UK you can apply literally every year or even every half year. Follow your dream and do not compromise. That’s my motto. Do not put up with second best. You’re not second best, so don’t go for a second-best place.

  26. trust me to get your name wrong, I was trying to alter it when the FUCKING THING PUT IT THROUGH AAAAAAARRKHHHHHHHHH

  27. Hello Seaeen,
    It might not help you much at the moment but look at all the comments and be very proud that you have all this support for all you do. You will win in the end.
    Keep well.

  28. I’m truly sorry for your bad news hun 😦 *hugs* you WILL make a great mental health nurse x

What say you? Comment here!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: