Posted on September 28, 2007 by Pole to Polar: The Secret Life of a Manic Depressive
My dad’s death changed my life.
I had learned to live with his depression and alcoholism, but I am still struggling to learn to live without him. The memory I am clinging onto right now is Christmas 2005, the last time I really spent time with him, and the last Christmas my family shared with [...]
Filed under: alcoholism, death, my dad, my family, photos, rob | Tagged: alcoholism, death, my family, photos, rob | 26 Comments »
Posted on September 28, 2007 by Pole to Polar: The Secret Life of a Manic Depressive
Ring ring. I’ve been trying to ring my CPN today but she’s not answering. I simply no longer have the energy. I rang ERC last night who told me to wait until today.
I’ve been quite quiet here recently. I have nothing intelligent or insightful to say at the moment. I’ve [...]
Filed under: Bipolar Disorder, depression | Tagged: Bipolar Disorder, depression | 11 Comments »
Posted on September 24, 2007 by Pole to Polar: The Secret Life of a Manic Depressive
Excuse the non-posts today but I thought I’d let you know that you can read this blog via Livejournal by adding the syndicated feed.
http://syndicated.livejournal.com/seaneen/profile
Filed under: Bipolar Disorder, livejournal | Tagged: Bipolar Disorder | 1 Comment »
Posted on September 24, 2007 by Pole to Polar: The Secret Life of a Manic Depressive
I have got the mad shakes today! My hands are a blur!
Shaking is NOT conducive to robot dancing. I had a go on my fag break but I just looked like a hoover with a penny rattling inside.
Filed under: robot dancing, things completely unrelated to manic depression | Leave a Comment »
Posted on September 23, 2007 by Pole to Polar: The Secret Life of a Manic Depressive
The promised land, in the course of mental illness, is being “well”. But as Mr Man’s Wife points out:
Mr Man seems reluctant to admit that he is improving though. I wonder if it is because subconsciously he worries that if others think he is improving then too much will be expected of him, or that [...]
Filed under: Bipolar Disorder | Tagged: Bipolar Disorder | 3 Comments »
Posted on September 23, 2007 by Pole to Polar: The Secret Life of a Manic Depressive
I miss my dad.
I’ve been making purposeless phone calls today to talk about, not much, just liking the sound of a voice.
I’ve spent the last twenty minutes chatting to my tea cup. It listens. And it needs a wash.
But I remember being on a beach in Suffolk, at the gloaming, in June last [...]
Filed under: my dad | Tagged: my dad | 2 Comments »
Posted on September 20, 2007 by Pole to Polar: The Secret Life of a Manic Depressive
Posted on September 20, 2007 by Pole to Polar: The Secret Life of a Manic Depressive
Good afternoon, dear readers! I haven’t got much to say for myself today. Stephen Fry has a new blog, I have a dry eye and the windy banks of the Thames today lend themselves to my ever-encompassing fantasies of running away to the sea. It is not just the tatty unruliness of London that is [...]
Filed under: stephen fry, the sea | Tagged: stephen fry | 1 Comment »
Posted on September 16, 2007 by Pole to Polar: The Secret Life of a Manic Depressive
This post will mostly be a bit of a mix of stuff. Mostly rather introspective and self pitying, since, in clichéd Saturday Night fashion, I’m not feeling super-great tonight. Everyone gets cranky and I’m no exception, you’ll be pleased to know. In case you’re wondering, I do talk about other things [...]
Filed under: Bipolar 1 Disorder, alcoholism, being mentally interesting, coping with manic depression, death, how manic depression can impact on your life, mania, manic depression, mental illness, mental patients, my dad, psychosis, rapid cycling bipolar, recovery, rob, sadness, seaneen's massive strop, suicide, vicky, weird crazy people, work | Tagged: alcoholism, death, mania, manic depression, mental illness, my dad, psychosis, rob, suicide | 10 Comments »
Posted on September 14, 2007 by Pole to Polar: The Secret Life of a Manic Depressive
I know that people who grew up in the playground will be shouting, “YES!” at the screen right now.
At the moment, I’m not superfantastic nor am I superterrible. This middling area of moderate depression punctuated with bouts of mild hypomania is what my doctor would term as “being alright”. In my case, as long as I’m [...]
Filed under: bipolar, disability | Tagged: bipolar | 11 Comments »
Posted on September 10, 2007 by Pole to Polar: The Secret Life of a Manic Depressive
Ah, work, me and my being mentally interesting. We have a complicated relationship fraught with tensions and occasional angry sex.
Sometimes, I find it hard to reconcile my principles with my personal experience.
This reared its head earlier in a discussion about benefits. I do believe that the State (whatever that may be in your mind, a [...]
Filed under: Bipolar Disorder, Mental health, benefits, bipolar, depression, manic depression, paranoia, psychosis, work | Tagged: benefits, bipolar, Bipolar Disorder, depression, manic depression, Mental health, psychosis | 18 Comments »
Posted on September 10, 2007 by Pole to Polar: The Secret Life of a Manic Depressive
Posted on September 6, 2007 by Pole to Polar: The Secret Life of a Manic Depressive
The day of reckoning arrived today: should I tell my boss about my manic depression?
When I was offered this job, I had to fill in a health questionaire. I researched my rights on this and came to the conclusion that not being honest on the form would give my work the right to kick me [...]
Filed under: bipolar | Tagged: bipolar | 7 Comments »
Posted on September 4, 2007 by Pole to Polar: The Secret Life of a Manic Depressive
I’m 22! Hurrah!
Fingers crossed for no hospitalisations this year! I’ve had a breakdown every year since I was thirteen so come on twenty two!
I am going out later with friends but I went to Stay Beautiful on Saturday (being my birthday SB it was a nice free night out! I didn’t buy any [...]
Filed under: birthday, photos, stay beautiful | Tagged: photos | 7 Comments »