The Cans and Cannots For the Mentally Interesting

Now that I am, ahem, a “larger lady”, I can’t walk anywhere without mentally picturing a tuba fart with each step I take.
As I was Fat Person Walking earlier on my lunchbreak, chugging down a much needed cigarette (thank you Rob), a ramshackle dude, clutching a cheap can and looking like an extra out of [...]

Bright Ideas Number 20: Banning Smoking on the Acute Wards

Cigarette. I want a cigarette. Now. Right now.
Thanks to not being paid this Friday, I have been dirtying my fingers in one of my many “ashtrays” (which are actually overflowing glass cups with some tea bags festering into them) and smoking sodden butts. Disgusting? Yes. But more than alcohol, more than [...]

Search Terms

For a bit of light relief, I thought I’d share with you some of the recent odd search terms that lead people to this blog:
I want to have sex with Miriam (I wonder if it’s my Miriam?)
Working with a nasty prick (figuratively or literally?)
Big strong women
Vibrator side effects (Rattling all the time)
Anxiety because [...]

Reader Survey

Okay, just a little survey to see where the traffic is coming from. Could you please do me the favour of answering some questions, even if you don’t normally comment:
1. How did you find this blog?
2. Do you have this blog bookmarked?
3. Did you follow a link here, if so, from where?
4. Did you [...]

Bullying and “issues” not related to being manic depressive. For once.

I was thinking earlier that maybe bullying precipitated Borderline Personality Disorder but apparently, it’s the bullies who exhibit symptoms.
Bullying, at the time, impacts seriously on your mental health. You lose self-esteem, feel like a worthless person and constantly blame yourself. But what impact does it have later in life?
Bullying is one of [...]

The Most Boring Entry Ever To Be Written in this Blog

And there’s a lot of competition.
I am feeling much better. I slept for a long time. I have had a cup of tea, a few cigarettes and have watched Black Books.  I was woken up earlier by my landlord banging on the door and trying to open it with his keys.  I shouted [...]

Toxic

Hello chaps. Excuse the quietness. I’ve been sick with Lithium toxicity. Vomiting all the colours of the rainbow, have the squits, being shaking like an alcoholic and can make sense of little. I’m off to bed now. I am never touching Lithium again. Hooray!

Disipedia

There’s a new disabled community in the form of Disipedia. It has a massive collection of articles and links as well as a forum and cultural bits and bobs. Go see.

Help! Who am I? Only Facebook has the answer.

The more spectacle wearing, thoughtful “umming” beacons of the psychiatry profession would attest that our sense of identity is crafted initially by those who rear us- our parents for example- and cemented at an early age. The first thing we learn how to write is our own name. And that name, as a [...]

“The unwanted other in the relationship”

Manic depression has made me alternately attractive and hideous. The strain of my erratic behaviour, manic demands and paralysing, life-draining depressions have effectively wrecked most of my relationships and put a strain on my friendships and my family. It does feel like an unwanted other. That phrase really struck me. Especially since I am sitting [...]

What the hell is a “victim” anyway?

Thanks for all your “good luck”s! The job went okay. I was very nervous so therefore talked too much and rambled a little, but first day and all that. The people are lovely, and the role seems quite challenging. Hopefully, I will be up to it.
In the most recent abuse I’ve [...]

The noisy life of a manic depressive

It’s no wonder people go mad. This world is a constant cacophony. I lay in bed at 6am this morning listening to the wittering of the birds and the creaking of the flat. I’m somewhat curious as to what the birds are talking about. They always sound to me like petulant schoolgirls, in the conspiratorial [...]

Mental Illness Top Trumps

Mental Nurse have written a post on psychiatric patients not all being the same.
JX said on my previous post:
When people play the “I’m more ill than you” card, I don’t contest it. I don’t know why anyone would want to play top trumps in that regard. But there does seem to be a lot of [...]

“I’m More Bipolar Than You”

It will reflect badly on me posting this and it’s against my better judgment but oh well.
I managed to get myself into a fight on my Livejournal last night, which started with my saying I didn’t like wearing my sleeves up (obvious reasons) and ended with abuse being thrown at me, variously calling me a [...]

I can’t sleep.

Enough about me. How can I help you?

Friday the 13th

Firstly, from Rethink, a worthy but questionably articulated call to action:

Dear supporter
Did you know that a person with mental illness has 10 times less spent on their care than someone with cancer? At Rethink, we think this is unfair, especially as more years are lost to mental illness than to cancer.
You can act now to [...]

9-5

There’s an interview with me here for BBC’s Ouch Access 2.0 minisite if you’re interested.
Slightly better today, although that one dose of Lithium knocked me incredibly hard and I am still struggling to stop shaking. I look like an alcoholic. I’ve been convalescing a bit today, watching Red Dwarf and lying down a [...]

The Absent Life of a Manic Depressive

The inperceptible slowness is beginning. I feel almost not-here. My emotions have begun to flock from me. I spent a large part of the morning so agitated that I cut my thigh with my fingernails.
Because I’m doing so well, I won’t have any psychiatric or CPN appointments for a few months. [...]

These violent delights have violent ends

Whining, ranting entry, best not read.

Strange Search Terms Part 2

Five people have stumbled across this blog using the search term, “Extremely Huge Boobs”.
Make of that what you will.
Love,
Miss Seaneen, 38D.